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How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

Last Updated: 17.06.2025 07:55

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.

By taking turns talking.

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

Can it be true that people know your name, not your story, they’ve heard what you’ve done, but not what you’ve been through, so take their opinions of you with a grain of salt?

By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.

By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

Why do Americans and foreigners alike describe the USA as prudish? Why do I see nothing prudish about the USA society? USA feels like one of the loosest countries although Americans claim to be very reserved.

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”